fiabeag
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Religion: Gaelic Polytheism
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Post by fiabeag on Dec 25, 2015 12:11:04 GMT -6
It's been a bit of a hard holiday season this year because my paternal grandfather, the oldest remaining member of that side of the family, is quickly running out of time on this Earth, and alarmingly so. The cancer we only found out about a matter of months ago is spreading quickly to his bones, and he's in an incredible amount of pain. He doesn't want to be treated by this point, and it's so hard to see him in the state he's in, either in too much pain to speak, or so drugged up he's hardly there. Other members of the family are very upset by this, because they want him to keep fighting, but Grandpa is very set in his ways, and very prideful. He doesn't want anyone to see him in this state. But I digress.
The point is that his big sleep is coming, and fast. I don't know how to prepare for this, especially spiritually. I'd very much like to pray to Manannan for his safe passage, and to Brigid to ease the pain, but Grandpa is very, very Christian (Catholic, more specifically), and I don't know if that meshes well. Does Manannan deal with folks heading to heaven? Would it make any sense for me to pray and give offerings to my gods when they aren't his? If not, is there something I can do to make his last months more bearable, and ensure a good afterlife?
What have other GaelPols done in the past when faced with the death of a loved one? If you can talk about your experiences, I'd like to hear them.
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Boggan
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Post by Boggan on Dec 25, 2015 15:33:42 GMT -6
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandfather; I lost my grandmother last year so I know the pain you are going through. I will keep you and him in my thoughts.
A thought regarding your question: There are many Brigantine devotees who believe that Brighid also has a guise in the form of the Catholic saint, St. Brigid of Ireland. Perhaps praying to Her in that form would not only give you some solace but your grandfather as well since She is in both of your traditions.
Your own work with your deities (which happen to be some of my own as well) should help ease his passage by giving you the strength and peace of mind in being there for him. Good energy out usually helps, regardless of the methodology taken.
Again, all my best.
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fiabeag
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Religion: Gaelic Polytheism
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Post by fiabeag on Dec 28, 2015 17:19:26 GMT -6
Thanks so much for your thoughtful reply, Boggan. It means a lot, and the advice is very helpful. I dug around and found a perfect prayer to St. Brigid for this particular situation, and I intend to use it, if I can.
UPDATE: (Hopefully I'm not oversharing. It leads into my next question for the group, though.) Unfortunately, we received bad news today in the form of test results that state my Grandpa no longer has months, but mere weeks left. This means two things for me: one, that I have less time than I thought to prepare the both of us for his passing (which will be hard in the coming weeks because I will be visiting more family in another state, none of which are aware of my practice and I'll be without adequate supplies anyway), and that when I see him later tonight, it will be the very last time.
So I guess my question is if anyone has tips for prayers/offerings in conditions without an altar and in relative secrecy? I'm not sure I'll even be able to get my hands on a candle, but we'll see, I suppose.
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Boggan
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Posts: 46
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Post by Boggan on Dec 29, 2015 5:41:07 GMT -6
Happy to help where I can. I only hope you can find some solace in the prayer and your work with Brighid. As to your next question, I personally believe that intention is the most important thing in working with the deities. For something like this, where you might not be able to use a candle, I recommend using your cell phone as a sort of "virtual altar". I've done so in the past when I was tending flame for Brighid and could not have an actual flame present. Change your background to a candle and offer up the prayer silently if needed (keep a copy on your phone as well); She will hear it.
My utmost sympathies for you and your family in this time of hardship - May his passing be a peaceful one.
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Post by Allec on Dec 29, 2015 23:27:15 GMT -6
I second Boggan on every account.
I also don't think it'd be odd if you prayed to any of his favorite Saints or even to Jesus or Yahweh, given that they were his deities and they may be the ones he's most comfortable with in the afterlife.
The app idea is a GREAT way to make an on-the-go altar. You can also take a picture of your altar and use your phone to place it next to the bed or however you want to do it. But don't worry about getting it done "right" because you should also just spend what little time you have with your grandpa's corporeal body. I deeply regret not doing that with my grandma when she was sick, so I hate for you to have those regrets.
May Brighid watch over your family, may her mantle keep you warm, and may she gently bring peace to all involved!
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fiabeag
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Religion: Gaelic Polytheism
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Post by fiabeag on Dec 31, 2015 11:04:12 GMT -6
Thanks so much to both of you -- your advice is solid and very much appreciated, as well as the sympathy and blessings. (I just hope it's okay for me to pray to saints when I'm not initiated into the Catholic faith?)
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Boggan
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Posts: 46
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Post by Boggan on Jan 1, 2016 12:54:13 GMT -6
I'd say our intent is just and you do it out of respect and comfort for your grandfather as well as for his faith. St. Brighid is believed by some to be another incarnation of the goddess Brighid so perhaps think of it as just another means and tradition in talking/working with her. I also worship my ancestors and keep an altar to them that includes many relics and symbols of the Christian faith because it was some of their paths and faith as well. We have to respect and remember all facets of our ancestors, at least for me.
All my best and I will gladly offer my own prayers to Brighid for your grandfather. Take care.
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Post by Allec on Jan 6, 2016 0:47:35 GMT -6
Yup... my ancestor altar has a Catholic hymnal because she loved the music at Catholic Church. I think as long as you're respectful, it should be fine  Sending my thoughts Fiabeag! |
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Post by Radha Ní Dhaimhín on Jan 19, 2016 12:37:55 GMT -6
Sending love and prayers at this difficult time, fiabeag!
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